Maladaptive daydreaming & What is a book or movie that always puts me in a good mood, and why?

UGHHHHHH, This is like a super super duper duper private thought and I will never ever ever ever let anyone read this. My favorite daydream is coming home from the cocktail party with my Christmas tree lit and with some presents under the tree. There is a sentimental feel in the air and my crush texts, "Can I come over?" and I say, "Yes." He gets here and we just talk and laugh with Christmas instrumentals in the background. We might kiss and just enjoy the moment with no expectations just a nice time. He might've came over yesterday blog and it was a good time. I think he's very fascinating and I can see him. I wish he was able to see me. We hugged for the first time yesterday :-) Well the second the first time was a side hug at the happy hour in August. We almost hugged again at work but I could not do that. Anyways, I don't think I should continue since I do not want to keep waxing poetry. 

I wish I knew what he felt about me. 

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My favorite song to make me happy is On Your Side - A Rocket To The Moon. It's just gets me happy and very singable (if that is a word). While Lana Del Rey is my favorite artist I don't think her songs really get me in a good mood, maybe a contemplative mood. 

My favorite movie is The Breakfast Club, I can remember watching it in high school when I thought everything meant everything, I watched when I felt like nothing and it it made me feel. So now I just watch it in a nostalgic type of a way. 

This blog was short, it was important for me to write today. I feel like I am in my head today. 

"I'm not sure I'm capable of being loved right now. I feel safe in my quiet way of living and telling my secrets to threads & paper. I don't know what I'd say if you asked me to know myself. "